"My brow furrows, "But I-"She shakes her head as best she can, a melancholy smile on her lips. She brings her hands up to circle my wrists. "I could'v... stopped you. I could've said stop. You stopped when I took your wrist." She squeezes a wrist lightly, as if to remind me. "But I didn't."And I'm feeling things again. Painful things. Big, angry stabs in the heart."Then why-"She shrugs, a little self-deprecating laugh escaping her. "I don't know." She shakes her head, "I just... I don't know. I. They preferred to believe in the miracles of our own lord Matty. The Low Friars basked in reflected glory as well, it was known that all my healing and wisdom was learned from them.One of my first enactments as the new Earl was to sponsor a copy smithing of all the hundreds of manuscripts the Low Friars had amassed as well as the few others to be found. It was slightly impious to neglect copying and illuminating the Good Book, but with the unmentionable transgression of my brother who’s name is. TheBaroness was greatly fond of my Farrah and Alistair's Sylvia, both of whomtook after their grandmother in looks and personality, and also fond ofthe cute girbys, often saying "They are adorable, Dame Rylann. Both willfetch a goodly bride price when the time comes."When our armed forces prevailed and peace came again, Nanette celebratedby trouncing me every night for three weeks in a row and inflating pudgylittle Alistair like a beach ball. He birthed Gretchen in Third Month of3294. I felt. I’m very minded sexually,however my husband wasn’t and the boredom contributedto our divorce. It wasn’t really nasty I don’t guess.We had our fights, yes, but it was a blessing indisguise I suppose. I kept my few belongings. He gotthe dog and the house. I kept my sanity.The past few months, I have struggled with some of myown perverse kinks I guess you can say. I struggledwith an inner battle of guilt. You see, I am azoophile, and I’ve always felt it was somehow.
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